Hello, everybody! My name is Norm Gallagher. Some of you may be thinking, “So? Who cares?” Ok, I get that. I am related to those shameless South Side of Chicago Gallaghers. My younger brother is Frank Gallagher, a spectacularly worthless reprobate. I’m the Gallagher that no one talks about. I’m not an alcoholic, I don’t use illicit drugs, I’ve never been in jail, never had any trouble with the law (except for – full disclosure – a few speeding tickets.) I’ve never stolen another person’s property, heck, I don’t even know how to spell the word skam. I’m not passing myself off as perfect, but I endeavor to do what’s right. Yes, I’m the white sheep of the Gallagher family. Even though I do not have direct contact with my infamously shameless relatives, I still keep up with the goings on in that dump of a house they live in on the South Side. I think my niece, Fiona, had the right idea. She came into some money, apparently legally, gave some to her siblings and took off to California or someplace. Maybe she’ll shed the Gallagher stain out there. The rest of them . . . well, who knows? I hear that Lip has become a dad and is trying really hard to shape up, stay sober, and make a somewhat honest living. I would guess that his greatest fear is being the kind of father that Frank was. Ian got out of the clink and is working as an EMT. The rumor is, his parole officer is involved in some shady stuff, so good luck to Ian staying out of that. Debbie is quite full of herself these days. She runs the household, more or less, even though she’s still a kid. That has a kid, by the way. Hard to know who watches her daughter while she’s out gallivanting around. Carl surprisingly graduated from military school, which, I don’t know, I bet there was something fishy about that. Sometimes it seems like he wants to do good, but . . . he just can’t overcome the defective genes that Frank passed on to him, I guess. And then there’s Liam. I love that little guy, but I fear for him. Inevitably, he’s going to be overwhelmed by the tsunami of Gallagherness around him. I can’t believe how these people behave, my own flesh and blood. They act as though they are TV characters, putting on some kind of show from week to week. It’s pathetic.